Browsing CategoryInspiration & Motivation

Your were not created in vain

Am I the only one, especially in real tough times question why did God made me, or think it would have been better if I were not born? Isaiah 45 instructs us on how to deal with these negative thoughts. What sorrow awaits those who argue with their Creator. Does a clay pot argue with its maker? Does the clay dispute with the one who shapes it, saying, ‘Stop, you’re doing it wrong!’ Does the pot exclaim, ‘How clumsy can you be? Ish 45:9 Firstly, we must make peace with our Creator. We did not make ourselves and we must…

Trust God’s timing

A few years ago I wanted to buy a vehicle so badly that I was willing to jump through hoops in order to get it.  After all, I was tired of taking the bus and this certainly was not the life I was accustom to prior to my divorce.  I went to a car mart, selected a van and the dealer assured me that he was able to get a loan on my behalf.  “It’s a given.” He said.  “I will submit the documents and call you when the loan is approved.” Two days later, I was called and it…

Controlling anger that stems from divorce

One of the emotions that I encountered during the separation and the aftermath of the divorce was anger.  I was extremely angry at my ex; how he seem to just replace my kids and I with his new, younger bride and their kids in less than 4 years of the separation.  I was angry at my pastor who knew us as a couple, knew about my ex infidelity but yet officiated at the wedding of my ex and his pregnant bride.  I was angry when the photos of my ex’s wedding flooded facebook and people in our circles congratulated him. …

Trust yourself again

More than once after I shared the story about the events that led to my divorce, I am asked “didn’t you see any sign that your ex is that kind of a person?” or they will comment “you must have seen some red flags.” I honestly saw no red flags or I may have totally missed them, I had no idea my ex has that side to him.  As a matter of fact, I thought he was one of the sweetest people.  I was totally blindsided and I believe this is why the betrayal was so painful. ften times when…

Stumbling block to emotional healing

Life sometimes throws a curve ball our way so forceful that our plans and dreams are shattered into pieces and leave us so broken to the point where it is easy to get stuck in our pain.   It takes great courage to get up and move on but so worth it because for every end there is a new beginning. will not in any way undermine the grief that is associated with the lost of a loved one, the end of a relationship, loss of a job or any other tragedy that you may have faced.  However, someone was hurt…

SHELTERING YOUR KIDS WHILE WEATHERING THE STORMS OF DIVORCE

One of my greatest concerns during the separation and subsequent divorce after 17 years of marriage was the effect it would have on my children.  The union between my spouse and I produced two awesome boys who were extremely close to their dad. You may also want to read Weathering the Storms of Divorce During a divorce the welfare of the children must take precedence and the love for them must outweigh any negative emotions you may have towards your spouse. Here are some of the steps I took to shelter my children while weathering the storms of divorce: irst…

HANDLING GOSSIPING WHILE WEATHERING THE STORMS OF DIVORCE

  After 17 years of marriage my husband and I got divorced. You may also want to read “Weathering the Storms of Divorce.” That period was the darkest and most painful time in my life and the last thing I wanted was for people to be gossiping about us – wishful thinking.  I assumed people were gossiping before but it was when my husband and I legally separated that the gossiping escalated and sadly the people who talked about us were not just strangers; some were other church members, families and friends. If only it were true that “stick and…

Steps I took to survive the storms of divorce

In my previous blog “Weathering the storms of divorce” I shared my emotional roller coaster I experienced during the separation and subsequent divorce after 17 years of marriage. I was at a very dangerous cross road and I had to decide whether I would die for the husband who had betrayed my trust or live for my children. I chose to live and fought with depression and hopelessness to regain myself. Here are some of the steps I took to survive the storms of divorce: I sought professional counselling – I decided to seek professionally counselling. Fortunately for me I was studying…

Weathering the storms of divorce

have had my shares of challenges in my life but the most hurtful, painful and devastating experience I had was when my marriage fell apart and ended in divorce after 17 years of togetherness – not even the death of my mother was this painful. I went through so much emotional turmoil that I totally get why people try to drown their sorrows in a bottle.  I also came to fully realize the thin line that exist between sane and insanity. In the early stage I was in so much disbelief and shock.  I never imagined that this could happen…

HOPE IS THE ANCHOR

y marriage fell apart after 17 years..  The time between the separation and post divorce was one of the darkest time in my life.  I can vividly remembered every time I opened my eyes after a restless sleep I would literally see the cloud of depression hanging over my head. Just to take a shower was like a big chore.  I was downed, depressed, distressed and disappointed.  I would lock myself in my room and cried my eyes out, then wiped my tears, forced a smile and attended to the well being of my sons.  I could not let them…